When a biological crisis unavoidably occurs, I plan to live through a zombie attack more successfully than even the esteemed professionals depicted in the film Zombieland. My survival plan for the zombie apocalypse is as follows:
- Become well informed of the possible situation by educating myself in the diverse literature and cinema surrounding inevitable zombie attack
- Make good use of a Costco membership by purchasing copious amounts of nonperishable foods and survival items
- Board up all exterior windows and doors in my home with the otherwise unnecessary scrap wood in the basement
- Research zombie strategy and weakness via social media to plan effective defensive techniques
- Create list of reasonable rules to be followed by residents of secured household
- Carry out strategies based on research and availability of resources
- Keep phones charged, food well-stocked, and spirits high whenever possible
- Maintain family’s security as the only priority through continued enforcement of rules
- Survive and even thrive while awaiting inevitable end to zombie attack
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